that's why you go away...

Baby won't you tell me why there is sadness in your eyes
I don't wanna say goodbye to you
Love is one big illusion I should try to forget
but there is something left in my head

You're the one who set it up now you're the one to make it stop
I'm the one who's feeling lost right now
Now you want me to forget every little thing you said
but there is something left in my head


I won't forget the way you're kissing
The feeling's so strong were lasting for so long
But I'm not the man your heart is missing
That's why you go away I know

You were never satisfied no matter how I tried
Now you wanna say goodbye to me
Love is one big illusion I should try to forget
but there is something left in my head


Sitting here all alone in the middle of nowhere
Don't know which way to go
There ain't so much to say now between us
There ain't so much for you
There ain't so much for me anymore

2.1.13 --> kali kedua di luka kan..

jujur dalam hidup nie, cume 2 org yg betul2 aku cinta yg berjaya buat hati aku tertarik untk berkapel n mempunyai harapan yg tinggi dengan mereka...

seorg adalah first couple aku yg mana dye adalah seorg student accounting di uitm kbm tempat yg sama aku belajar kite panggil dye H... berjumpa dye tuk kali pertama adalah pabila dye muncul di hadapan screen computer aku di salah satu social networking yg ada haha ape lagi FB lah [and another one]. seperti biasa aku mmg suke org yg LEBIH TUA dari aku so dngn harapan dye dapat pegang tangan aku n bimbing aku.. mule2 seperti kapel2 bese, ktorg set the rules n condition yg perlu dlm sesebuah relationship, so aku pon dgr lah n setuju ngn condition memasing.. dye nk aku paham yg dye bz, fine by me, aku lak nk, atleast 1 hari 1 mesej dr dye... tuh jer yg ktorg nk... n dengan sweet nye dye cakap ngn aku, "i nk kasih sayang kita ni seperti benih pokok yg i tanam n u kene siram hari2, jage dye supaya dye[cinta] ley membesar n kukuh walau ade angin taufan yang melanda", god.... that is so ROMANTIC n just whut i want.... tp sayang selepas sebulan lebih, dye dah tak wat ape yg aku nk that is to text me, furthermore, dye hanya cari aku ble dye ade problem, sepertinya aku ni just tempat meluahkn masalah... plus yg wat aku geram, dye ckp bz tp kwn aku nmpk dye selalu kuar ngn kwn2 dye n ade masa tuk dorg... aku cube paham tp nmpknye TAHAP PEMAHAMAN AKU HANYALAH KECIL JER.... tak mampu nk paham n puaskn hati sume org.. so aku mintak timeout so ktorg ley settle baik2... dye janji nk berubah, tp dah 3 mgu aku bagi masa n takde perubahan, last2 gaduh kat FB n BREAK....

now the second person yg berjaya buat aku JATUH CINTA n TERBUKA HATI tuk kapel lagi is seorg manusia yg berumur 29 tahun n kite panggil dye R, jumpe biasalah di FB, n kisahnye baru jer lagi kottt.. sgt baru.. lebih kurang 5 hari jer termasuk hari ini.. first kenal is ble dye subscribe kat aku n komen pic aku ngn komen "kapel ekh?", aku ckplah bukn tu kwn bek aku jer, knpe? , wahh dye balas ape tau "jeles....." ... ok, time tuh aku dah bingung, sebb kawan bek aku tuh hot, tak mcm aku so aku punye lah ingt dye nk tackle kawan bek aku tuh, so aku tak layan lah......... hahah...

tertibe, ade fren request, n aku just accept lah... n dye IM aku n start lah berbual pada jam 2pagi yer.. heheh... yg menariknye dye berjaya wat aku menangis first time chat, ktorg try to skype, fb video call n ym, tp seems ade problem pagi tuh tak tau knpe, so last invite webcam kat ym jer haaha.. bual punye bual, tertibe dye amek phone n mintak number aku n trus call aku on the spot smbil ktorg tgk diri masing2 di screen cmputer yg tak brape nk terang tuh... ok, suara sangat2 best... dye petah berkata2... bnyk yg dya ckp kat aku, DYE BACA SUME STATUS N KOMEN KAT FB AKU DARI FIRST TIME AKU WAT FB SMPAI SEKARANG, yelah kat FB aku gune timeline so ley r baca nk wat camtu.. aku sgt terperanjat oke.. sape tak terperanjat n aku tnye ble mase awak ade mase tuk baca sume tuh? dye cakp "am using it now to call u" , terpingga2 aku n baru aku prasan its a BB.. hahah.. then dye cakp, CAN U STOP BEING FAKE? ok, itu lagi lah aku terperanjat kan? tertibe ade org ckp stop being fake... aku tnye fake ape? dye ckp "STOP PRETENDING THT U R STRONG!" haaa.. hamek ko... org yg tak kenal aku tertibe ckp camtu kat aku tru phone.. terus aku start menitiskn air mata... dye ckp dye ley nmpk most of my pic ble ngn kwn2 senyuman aku agak palsu seolah2 aku bertahan tuk dorg... ok time tuh aku dah betul2 JATUH HATI... [its called falling in love becuz we can't predict when we are gonna fall for sumone isn't it rite?] ... dye wat aku berjanji pada malam tuh tuk jgn tinggalkn dye walau ktorg hanya kwn... hari berlalu ngn ktorg selalu IM n post w2w... tp, ble aku tak dgr ckp dye, dye agak marah n stop IM, aku punye lah sedih n takut, aku selalu send msj mintak maaf, tp dye ckp, tertibe hilang chemistry n dye ckp dye lebih marah ble ckp ngn aku... ok, aku tau dye mintak aku letak dye as no 4/5 in my life, sebb bagi dye 1. family, 2. education, 3. frens, 4 or 5 baru lah lover.. tp disebbkn dye org KEDUA yg berjaya wat aku JATUH CINTA then mmg lah aku letak dye no 1... tp sume tuh dah tak gune dah smpai last2 pagi tadi jam 3.13pagi ble aku cek fb, skype n ym, account dye dah takde kat situ sume... aku text terus, aku tnye adakh ngn unfren aku bermaksud dye tanak aku lagi dah... dgn selmba dye ckp, i had enuf dramas n emo sessions... so as to me 2012, either people go with my flow or they can just F off.. i got no more room for dramas n emo sessions. its better to be unfren than being blocked, u put num 1, i asked to be num 4/5.. u think bout it urself, well itu lah serbe sedikit tentang hubungan cinta yg tak kemana yg aku rasa....

sumpah aku nangis semalam ble dye ckp camtu... aku tau aku mude tp dye yg approach aku n dye jugak yg wat aku sedih cmni... tp aku takkn benci or lupekan ex aku nie.. sbb dorg adalah org yg berjaya menakhluki hati aku yg aku jaga selama ini...

well ni jerlah tuk entry kali nie.. owh ya, lupe lak, azam taun ni nk update blog kalo ley tiap hari sekali or lebih pon takper.. heheh... >.<

1.1.12 --> makan di umbai for the first time~!

heeeeeee blog di update lagi hehehe... ;)

entry kali ni is about for the first day of 2012 man!! it 1st January of 2012 man!!! ktorg g makan kat umbai, makan seafood td beb, ikan siakap 3 rasa, ikan siakap bakar, kupang masak chili, udang butter... nyummyyyyyyy.... seyes sedap... plus aku minum air kelapa beb.... lama dah tak minum air kelapa tuh...

untunglahh org belanja sebb takde duit n dpt lak makn sedap2 hehehe.... sayang kawan2 aku ath and nisha n not to mention my bff awang famezan... >.< saya <3 kamu semua!! ngee~~

lupe nk bwk kamera td time g sebb tak plan langsung korunk tau tak, mule2 g kat tempat len then tempat tuh tutup, g lagi ke second place and again ikan abes last2 haaa amek kao , g umbai terussssss... naseb bek puas hati heee... smbil2 makan sambil2 cuci mater lerrr ngeee... :P

insyaallah aku de duit t nk ajak parents aku n family aku g sne hehe.. love u guys so much.. tgh2 update blog nie tertibe phone bunyi n my dad call, angkat call tp takde org jawap, kompem lah tertekan tuh.. hee. ape2 pun selamat malam kengkawan!! <3